Sometimes I feel angry...

Yesterday morning, I got into a big argument with my dad. I really don't even remember what it started about, but he was not in a good mood, and I tend to push his buttons. I think a part of it is that I just want him to admit that he has anger issues and to deal with them, but these arguments have been going on forever, and while things have changed some in the last 21 years, there is still a problem. And I will admit that I am a part of that problem. I let my anger get the best of me too. I have a hard time controlling my tongue, keeping my voice calm, and thinking about what I say before I say it. 

I think it is pretty safe to say that everyone has been angry at some point or another, but it is important to think about how we are are handling our anger. Last nights sermon was on anger, based on the passage in the Sermon on the Mount. 

Matthew 5:21-26

21 "You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.' 22 But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, 'Raca, ' is answerable to the Sanhedrin. And anyone who says, 'You fool!' will be in danger of the fire of hell. 23 "Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to that person; then come and offer your gift. 25 "Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still together on the way, or your adversary may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. 26 Truly I tell you, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.

The pastor talked about how anger destroys others as well as ourselves. It is a tough truth to swallow, but God sees anger as murder. 

1 John 3:14-15

We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love each other. Anyone who does not love remains in death. Anyone who hates a fellow believer is a murderer, and you know that no murderers have eternal life in them.

So the pastor suggested this answer to anger: Rush to reconcile and hurry to forgive. This is something that is very difficult for me. My father has never been one to say sorry unless it is forced out of him, and apologizing is definitely not easy for me either. I do not like admitting that I am wrong or that I have done something wrong. But I know that this is what God is calling us to do. I know that this is the right thing.

Romans 12:18

 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 

Colossians 3:8, 12-17

8 But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips... 12 Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. 14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. 15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. 16 Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. 17 And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

So that is my task, to forgive, to love, to not be angry and to not let anger take control of me. I need to let Christ rule my life and all things. And, only with His strength can I do this! God please help me!

On the other side of anger, is love. The only people that I am every usually angry with is my family. Even though they are the people that I love most, they are the people that frustrate me the most. This is one of my fears, that when I do find "Mr. Right", that I will get angry with him, and lose my temper. I fear that when I have kids, or even with my class, I will get angry. I do not want this to happen and there are many many verses in Proverbs that warn against being angry and warning us to control our tongue and to speak with wisdom. We are to love and trust in the Lord with our everything and to love others. During worship, I saw an elderly couple a few rows ahead of me. They were holding hands. That is a rare thing to see, especially for people their age, but it was so cute and that is the kind of relationship that I seek. I want a relationship and a love that lasts forever. I believe that when both people in the relationship love and trust God, and the relationship is founded on Him, God will ensure that their love continues. God wants us to feel loved and to love others, so He will give us all that we need, He will provide, and if we trust Him, He will help us to do what Colossians said, to clothe ourselves with good virtues to love.